Beautiful Lies
by FeastofDeath
Summary: Surrounded by lies ever since becoming Vongola Decimo,Tsuna couldn't help but think, a few minutes before meeting Byakuran, that maybe this time, it was his turn for one last beautiful lie. "I won't die." Liar.


**Author's note: **Another deathfic for Tsuna! Please enjoy this! :D

* * *

**Beautiful Lies**

_Telling the truth and making someone cry is better than telling a lie and making someone smile..._**  
**

Tsuna didn't know when his friends became expert liars.

At first it started innocently enough. Small little white lies, small little sputters, Tsuna could still tell a lie from the truth through facial expressions...

But he should've known.

With years came experience.

With experience came expertise.

The lies became more frequent, especially when Tsuna became the official Vongola Decimo...From small white lies (lying about who ate Tsuna's pudding, who painted Gokudera's room pink, who stole Hibari's tonfa- okay that wasn't a _small_ lie) it evolved into something _bigger_, something more _frightening_...

Something _irreversible..._

And Tsuna found himself staring at blank faces, blank voices, voicing out lies like they were the truth, like they _should _be the truth, pitiful wishful thinking...

But Tsuna _knew_.

He always knew.

"Gokudera-kun, how was capturing the assailant?" Tsuna took the trouble of looking up from his papers, brown eyes meeting tired green ones, trying to read the emotions there, trying to _see_ what they saw.

Gokudera bowed stiffly, the way his shoulders hunched was a clear indication of his tiredness and Tsuna was tempted to make him rest too- But Gokudera knew the protocol.

A report before one's health.

"It went fine tenth." Gokudera stated and inwardly he winced when Tsuna said nothing. He knew that that meant the boss wanted him to elaborate further. "No one was hurt. We managed to capture him before he hurt anyone."

Silence.

Sweat fell down Gokudera's forehead. He didn't want to straighten up and see Tsuna's expression, he didn't want to see brown eyes piercing him, drawing out the truth.

"That's a relief Gokudera-kun." A tired sigh of relief escaped the tenth's lips as Gokudera straightened up looking into soft brown eyes. "You did a job well done."

If Gokudera would've stopped, would've observed just a little bit, maybe he would've seen... would've _noticed _the emotion swimming behind them. The hurt, the _pain_...

The slow deterioration of trust.

But all Gokudera did was smile in happiness and relief. "Y-Yes Tenth! Thank you!"

Maybe this was Tsuna's mistake all along. Maybe because he encouraged these lies and never called his guardians on it... it got worse and his guardians started to think that maybe lying to their boss for his happiness was okay.

That maybe, it was fine to pretend that these were the good old days.

"You can go and rest now Gokudera-kun." Tsuna said, maintaining his smile as the bomber continued to smile at him. "I'll see you at dinner."

"Yes!" Gokudera said as he enthusiastically rushed out. Tsuna watched as the door closed behind the bomber. Brown eyes became shadowed as Tsuna held up the papers he was reading before Gokudera came.

_Wanted: Hiroki Suzuma  
Captured by: Gokudera Hayato  
Status: Dead  
Casualties: ..._

"The Nuble Family whose home the criminal was hiding out." Tsuna's hand clenched as he read the statement that turned all the words his storm guardian had said into lies.

One family was killed as well as the suspect.

Did Gokudera think Tsuna did not want to know this?

The brunet crumpled the paper before opening a drawer and placing it there, along with other crumpled papers. Blank brown eyes stared at the crumpled heap, silently counting them.

"That makes twenty-five..." Tsuna's eyes flickered sadly as he folded his arms on top of his desk and buried his face there.

_Twenty-five small, white, beautiful lies..._

* * *

"_Onii-san! What are you doing here?" Tsuna ran to the bleached hair, his flushed appearance clearly told of how busy he was despite being sick. He coughed but stopped himself, the grey eyes were worried enough as it is. "Isn't today your anniversary?'_

"_Don't EXTREMELY worry about it Sawada!" Ryohei laughed. "Hana cancelled on me so I EXTREMELY thought of coming here instead!"_

"_Ah, r-really?" Tsuna said, somewhat unbelieving. "E-Even s-so y-you should..." But Tsuna began coughing and Ryohei placed an arm around him, ushering him to his room._

"_Don't EXTREMELY worry Sawada, leave everything to me!" Ryohei had grinned at him and the brunet had thought it was fine at that time but..._

Lies...

_Kyoko called him several hours later telling him about how Hana and Ryohei had a fight because Ryohei had to go to work when he heard Tsuna was sick._

All lies...

"_Lambo what happened? Why are you bleeding?" Tsuna asked the youngest member of their family worriedly._

"_Don't worry about it Vongola." Lambo waved off his surrogate brother's worry as he tried to stop the heavy bleeding from his nose. He was covering it from the boss' view. "It's those girls again. You know I can't refuse chocolates from girls." Lambo stated as he walked away and Tsuna's hands clenched on the handkerchief he was about to offer._

Always lying...

"_I-It isn't..." Tsuna said in a small tone as he looked down sadly. "I-It isn't even Valentines today Lambo. Valentines is five months from now."_

Why?

"_Yamamoto! You're finally back!" Tsuna said as he rushed to the double-oaked doors of the Vongola mansion. He froze when he saw his rain guardian covered in blood, a new scar on his chin."Y-You're hurt...!" Tsuna felt himself go pale as he reached out, trembling."Y-Your f-face-! You have to go-"_

_But Yamamoto held out a hand, signalling Tsuna that he was fine. He smiled painfully, amber eyes locking away his own horror and pain._

"_I-It's fine Tsuna..." He gasped out, almost wheezing. "I-It's n-not... It's not my blood."_

_Tsuna was outside Shamal's clinic, as Yamamoto muffled his screams while the doctor sewed all of his injuries closed._

_No one knew he was there, crying for God-knows how long._

Why were they always lying to him?

"_O-Oi, listen..." Tsuna heard a hushed voice from the dining room as he passed by. "Today is jyuudaime's birthday so he must not- cannot know okay? No matter what happens!"_

_The brunet carefully covered his presence as he peeked through the door._

_Brown eyes widened in horror as he saw almost all of his guardians gathering around the table, all covered in blood._

"_Stupid cow, I-I know i-it was horrible but c-can you hold it in? At least until the end of jyuudaime's birthday?" Gokudera whispered. Tsuna trembled when he saw Lambo sitting on the floor, his arms hugging his knees as he shook in fear._

"_S-Sempai, can't you tone it down a bit?" Yamamoto winced and Tsuna could see Ryohei trying to heal Yamamoto's arm. Tsuna had to place a hand on his mouth to stifle a gasp as he saw the different scars decorating the rain's good arm._

"_Stay still, it'll scar worse if you don't." The sun mumbled and behind him, the boss could see Chrome on her feet but shaking as she held her trident close._

"_You're spoiling the herbivore too much." Hibari spoke as he looked out of the window. He was the one covered the most by blood. There was even some on his face and hair. "Even if it's his birthday, he should know."_

_Gokudera growled, turning his attention to the cloud. "Don't you dare say a word about this Hibari. This wouldn't have happened if those damn famiglia didn't send so many men."_

"_We'll cover up our tracks as always." Ryohei said, not bothering to use his signature word. "Sawada should be happy on his birthday. We'll show up like nothing happened."_

_And a few hours later, they did. All had perfectly scripted smiles except Lambo who they excused as being sick due to a bug- but Tsuna didn't buy it even for one second._

They didn't have to go so far...

"_Herbivore, that friend of yours won't be coming today." Hibari said to Tsuna as he looked up from the tea he was drinking._

"_Huh, why?" Brown eyes showed hurt and confusion. Before Hibari could say anything, Gokudera spoke up when he entered and heard the conversation._

"_H-He was busy jyuudaime! It seems like he's transferring to another state." Gokudera said apologetically when he saw the pain enter the brown eyes._

"_What? So sudden? But he didn't even say anything! We didn't even have one last talk..." Tsuna said frantically but if on the outside he was distraught, on the inside he was suspicious. His intuition was telling him something else was up..._

_...he found out later that night when he heard the maids talking about the man who tried to poison his tea._

He didn't deserve their lies...

_Ryohei had come in one morning looking depressed and shocked. Tsuna was surprised, expecting Yamamoto to be the one in and submitting his report._

"_Sawada..." The sun guardian had said roughly as he extended the files Yamamoto was supposed to submit. "Yamamoto couldn't make it." And the boxer cringed at what he said._

_Tsuna raised an eyebrow worriedly. "Why? Is he sick?"_

_The young boss watched Ryohei struggle for a moment with the answer before nodding and turning to leave. The brunet wanted to call out to him, wondering if the sickness was life-or-death by the way he was acting but he held himself back, opting to ask someone else._

_Everyone kept avoiding him. No one would tell him what was wrong with Yamamoto, no one would meet his eyes._

_It was only a few hours later when Haru called him, in tears, that he understood._

_Yamamoto's dad was dead._

_Yamamoto's dad was _dead_, and no one wanted him to know._

_Several minutes later, Tsuna locked himself in his room crying while everyone attended the quiet funeral- the one no one told Tsuna about._

He didn't deserve to be obliviously happy while everyone suffered in silence.

_Tsuna curled up in his bed, hugging the cold pillow against him. Yamamoto had been assigned to eradicate a small family that had been ordered by Byakuran to kill his father. It was a secret mission given by Gokudera but no matter how much cover-up the Italian did..._

_Tsuna always _knew_._

_Just as how he always knew that tomorrow, Yamamoto was going to show up with a smile on his face, hiding away the scars, self-hatred, and despair he felt, and pretend that nothing of the like happened._

Such kind, _kind _lies...

Such kind, _kind _people telling such beautiful, _beautiful_ lies...

* * *

"Is everyone okay?"And Tsuna's voice was tired. So tired, because he knew, as he always does, that the words that would come out of those lips would be lies.

"Haha! Fine as can ever be Tsuna! I'm in top form!" Yamamoto stated with a grin.

_Not counting the multiple scars on your arm right Yamamoto? _Tsuna thought quietly to himself.

"Don't worry jyuudaime, everyone will come out of this fine!" Gokudera assured the boss.

_This is the Millfiore, Gokudera-kun. I'm afraid, some casualties have to be made. _Tsuna's eyes hardened.

"B-Boss, w-we're fine. Don't worry about us."Chrome said as Tsuna nodded and smiled.

_Are you sure Chrome? I heard from Mukuro about how you're trying to sustain your own organs. Does it hurt? _The brunet wanted to ask but held back. He wasn't supposed to know that. He wasn't supposed to have talked with Mukuro.

"We're not kids anymore Vongola. We're not scared of any family." Lambo said as he ate some candy he had. Tsuna closed his eyes.

_Oh really Lambo? Then tell me... _Tsuna looked at the lightning guardian. _Why are your hands shaking?_

"Vongola Decimo, your presence is required." Irie Shouichi said as he came out of the room. "Byakuran wishes you to be quick." He was careful not to look into Tsuna's eyes too long, careful not to betray his  
emotions of fear and uncertainty.

Tsuna was calmer. Nodding, he was about to follow, and his guardians took a step forward but-

"I'm sorry. Only the Vongola Decimo is allowed beyond this point." Irie stood between Tsuna and his guardians, he looked firm and serious but if you looked closely, his arms were shaking, and on the inside he wanted to move, to let the guardians through and protect their boss...

And as Tsuna expected there were outbursts.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"

"You can't expect us to-!"

"Sawada don't EXTREMELY go!"

"B-Boss I-I d-don't-"

But Tsuna held up his hand and all became quiet. He could see Lambo shaking in fear and the green eyes almost undid him, almost made him retreat and tell them-

A firm hand on his shoulder and he saw Irie just unsure as he was but putting up a font like how his guardians did when they lie, to preserve his happiness. He glanced at Hibari who gave a small nod of affirmation before looking away.

And thus, Tsuna knew that it was time...

Time for one last _beautiful lie_...

"I'll be fine everyone." Tsuna said and he summoned his most confident and softest smile as he looked at all his guardians. "I'll come out of there after convincing Byakuran one way or another. And afterwards we'll go set off some fireworks since it's the star festival in Japan right now..."

He saw Lambo's face relax because of the promise. The Lightning guardian knew Tsuna always kept his promises and somehow, this made the brunet's heart hurt.

But just this one time, he won't keep it.

"But jyuudaime-! The rings-!" Gokudera stated and Tsuna knew he was referring to Byakuran's demand on the rings. The bomber was worried what the Millefiore boss will do when Tsuna tells him he destroyed the rings.

"I'm strong even without it." Tsuna lied. The rings embodied his strongest resolve and without them, he was just a man with flaming fists and forehead.

"What if they attack you and you-?"

"I won't die." And this time Irie flinched while Hibari's eyes narrowed just a tiny bit. But all Tsuna did was smile at them in reassurance, not letting himself be so transparent when lying. "I'll come out alive and everything will get better."

"Y-You're..." Chrome gasped out, anxiousness in every action she made. "Y-You're telling the truth right? You'll keep your promise?"

But despite the anxiousness, the fear, and the worry directed at him, Tsuna stuck to his lie and nodded.

"I'm not lying." He said before he turned around to leave. "I'll come back to you and everything will be fine... I promise."

_This will be my first..._ Tsuna took a deep breathe as his eye shone in determination and sadness. _And my last..._

_...beautiful lie._

BANG!

* * *

BANG!

That night, several hours after the meeting with Byauran, several hours after the betrayal of the Millefiore boss, several hours after the worst shooting the guardians ever saw in their life...

...They were here, in Tsuna's office, waiting for the news of their bloodied boss, listening to distant fireworks set off by a nearby mansion.

They had known, somewhere inside them, they had known that something was off about their boss. The way he smiled before going to meet the bastard Byakuran, the peaceful look on his face as he laid on the white carpet of the floor, bleeding to death...

They had went to his study immediately, rummaging through every paper, trying to find anything that would keep them busy, that would let them understand even just a tiny bit of _what the hell just happened?_

And then they found them...

The crumpled papers Tsuna kept in the drawer of his mahogany desk. The information that had flipped all the lies they'd ever told. From actual reports of capture on every criminal they ever caught and the casualties, to medical reposts of the injuries they had shrugged of as nothing but were actually life-threatening...

It was then that had realized...

Every lies they had ever told, every smile that they had ever forced... Tsuna could _see_ through every one of them.

How were they sure?

Because the tears blotting the ink of every paper had been enough to tell them that...

And at that time, when Basil entered the office and found all of the guardians, except Hibari (who had settled by the window the moment he entered), shaking in tears from what they had found out... Somehow they had already realized what news Basil was going to give them.

Because the beautiful smile Tsuna gave them, before being shot, had already been an indication that the kind words he had said were nothing but...

_Beautiful Lies._

(When Tsuna's death did reach their ears, the guardians couldn't help but think that maybe they were being punished by the gods for lying so much and _still_ being unable to make their precious brunet happy... And if they were, then they wished even harder that maybe next time... the gods wouldn't take Tsuna away as a punishment.)

* * *

**Additional information:**

If some of you were expecting them to be in their base in Japan, well they weren't. In my story, they find out the existence of the Japan base while searching Tsuna's desk for anything to distract them. By finding this information they were even surer that Tsuna knew about his upcoming death and kept it from them.

**Beautiful Lies, **was titled as such because Tsuna's guardians are overprotective of him and instead of telling him the painful truth they cover it up with kind and beautiful lies that would ensure Tsuna's smile. The brunet thinks that he didn't deserve to live naively and happily while his guardians suffer, but he understands their feelings of wanting to spare him from sadness and horror because he too wishes to do the same for them. That's why in his last moments, Tsuna gives them a beautiful lie as well to erase their anxiousness and fear.


End file.
